VERY FEW PEOPLE ACTUALLY GIVE A SHIT ABOUT YOU: Take your ego out of it already

The harsh truth we all need to understand is that the majority of people do not care about you - they are truly more concerned about themselves. Take your ego out of it already.

This statement is not meant to come across as negative, bitchy or pessimistic. Those who know me, know I pride myself on always looking at life through a glass half-full lens; but this is a hard truth that I finally understand and feel it important to share with you.

I have learned to live an authentic life for me and nobody else. It has been through overcoming an eating disorder, dating losers and experiencing loss; that I know exactly who I am and what I have to offer. I actively make the choice everyday to live my life in a way where the majority of others' opinions do not matter.

I stand by this statement because my family, my true friends and most importantly I, know the type of person I am at my very core. This blog is not to come across all, “look at me, look at me.” However, I share this perspective because so many of us actively live our life simply to please others. I am not telling you to be selfish, but I am telling you to live your truth.

Ever since I was a little girl, I was always told that I was headstrong and could be Frank Sinatra's daughter (and not because I can sing, trust me I can't). To put this simply; I do what I want, when I want, how I want. This can be both a blessing and a curse and it has led to a lot of disagreements, but it has also led to mutual understanding and respect. I have learned to not allow society to dictate who I am or who I should be.

This is a helluva lot harder than it sounds; trust me, I know. However, it is so rewarding when you can go about your life and live no matter what people think, because if I had to be honest … very few people actually give a shit.

If you are worried to wear your favorite outfit out because it might not be “stylish,” just wear it. I can without a doubt tell you the strangers at the grocery store are too busy thinking about themselves, or are dealing with their own insecurities, or are working through a long list of daily to-do’s.

Take your ego out of it already. Not everyone is looking at you.

Once you truly understand this, you will tap into your true potential. You are you and that is your power.

I used to never leave the house without a full-face of makeup and a cute outfit because I would be worried that I would possibly run into a friend, a colleague or a cute boy and heaven forbid I didn’t look perfect.

This was around the time that I was struggling with my eating disorder - feeling like I had to be a certain way all the time to get others approval. I dated guys who said, “I liked you better when you were skinnier” or “why did you cut your hair, I liked it longer” and when I tried to open up for the first time about my orthorexia to an ex-boyfriend he told me to, “never bring that up again.”

I would be lying if I said that did not affect me in one way or another; I am human after all.

I look back and feel sad but oh so glad. I feel sad for those who felt the need to comment on my looks as opposed to something more significant to who I am at my core. At the end of it all - looks aren’t forever and can change in an instant. I also feel sad that I allowed myself to feel less-than because of a couple dick heads who clearly had insecurities of their own.

Over the last four years I have learned from my experiences and I now choose to do the things that spark joy in my soul no matter what. If you aren’t hurting anyone in the process and can look yourself in the mirror at the beginning and end of each day and feel good with the person looking back at you - that is all that really matters.

I now leave the house on any day of the week without having to put on makeup or get dressed in my Pinterest inspired outfit. My bare (and masked-up) face some days has acne, is puffy or has eye bags. Who really fucking cares...oh wait, nobody.

I now choose to own my loudness and the fact that I cuss like a sailor. I now choose to know my worth and tell said dickheads to kick rocks. I choose to surround myself with the people who love me for me - no matter my weight, hair length or extroverted personality. I used to feel like I needed to tone down parts of who I am to make others feel comfortable, but in doing that I was not being true to myself. I am now at the place in my life that if people don’t like me, that it is completely ok - but you are not my people.

This post is to share with you the hard truth that most people do not give a shit about you or what you do, so why waste your life trying to be a version of yourself that society, your friends, your boss or your colleagues want you to be - as opposed to the authentic, real, raw, flawed, flawless and beautiful person you were meant to be. Do not dim your light or your passions because it makes others feel uncomfortable. I ask you to invest in the few people who truly love, admire and give a shit about you. Those are your people.

With love and light,

Cheers xo

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